Sniff sniff, not you honey

Those who ever had any doubt over a man’s capability to smell, please note that I can and smell as good as anyone else. Well, I wonder why I was not selected as a wine-taster or a tea-taster yet but I am not inferior to them in sniffing out proper smells. I just got unlucky that I couldn’t get those jobs yet.

Internet tells us or rather demands that women are better in sniffing out smells. It is as if since women see more colors, they gotta be better is smelling as well. But I feel the reason men may fail in such tests is that they smoke or drink more compared to women, also they work outdoors more and are exposed to more pollution everyday. This could be the reason their sense of smell goes away. A man like me, who doesn’t smoke or drink and stays away from pollution is all set to have better in sense of smells. No wonder why I can smell tobacco even if someone smokes in the neighboring house. Well, that is more negative than positive. Also, I always counter the theory that women are better in smelling as almost all wine tasters or tea tasters are men. This is a profession that needs maximum and finest sense of smell. So men gotta be better than women in smelling.

SniffSniff
SniffSniff Winner

As I am sensitive to all kinds of smell, I am very choosy about the persons around me with bad odor. That goes well for everyone. It’s natural for a person like me to be put off by bad body odor of others.

There are some secrets that I share with others. Like –

A faint trace of lemon significantly increases my perception of my health – that is how the soap manufacturers are fooling us with lemon flavor. Personally, I like it too and that is an open secret now.

Lavender incense contributes to a pleasant mood — but it lowers our mathematical abilities. That is why spas have this fragrance all over. The magic that works well for my mind as well. This is magic that can work wonder in any bedroom in those sexually active nights, too.

A whiff of lavender and eucalyptus increases people’s respiratory rate and alertness and this has been the secret of aromatherapy massages that I enjoy.

Even though my secrets of ecstatic smells are out and universal, I can still smell the rat. Well, this is probably the reason why I never fall for those spa therapists who give me aromatherapy massages. They are seductive but not as much so that they get a place in my heart even for one night.

A good aromatherapy by a girl in her 20s is a perfect seduction recipe for a man but not as much if he is conscious about smells. Probably it has something to do with our matching chemistry as well.

This is what happened in one of my aromatherapy sessions. The girl was from north-east and has been very good at her work. Since both of us were single and both were of right age to get attracted, we did feel that. She gave me her number to contact. I had great expectation in my mind until she came too close. Well, her bad breath was a real put off. I didn’t call her back ever.

Similarly, I do hate smell of sweat of individuals and specially that of women but not everyone. When I tried to find a reason, I found that we hate smells of people who carry similar genetic profile and get attracted to those who have opposite genetic profiles.

When I was married, once I played a blindfold game, to identify my child by sniffing. It was a competition between sexes to identify whether the mother or the father can identify the child correctly by sniffing their head while being blindfolds. I could identify my baby perfectly and broke the myth that men can’t have better sense of smells. But I should confess today, that the artificial smells created by the baby brands actually take away their real smells and leave brand’s smell in our mind. So when we take away that brand or replace it with another our babies start smelling different and we fail to recognize them correctly. But I was not to be fooled.

Challenge is, what if multiple children use same brand of powder or baby creme? Will the babies smell the same? Not really. Not at least to the people like me.

Today, we have mostly one brand that has almost gotten the patent of universal baby odor. But still their products smell different when applied on different babies and parents like me can understand the same. This is the reason I could win in the identifying the baby by sniffing his body odor while remained blindfolded. I had full faith in winning, because I could identify my baby by his smell.

Be it choice of partner or identifying my own baby. I can do that almost perfectly with my impeccable sense of smells. So honey don’t even try to fool me.

***

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